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Only almost here

Saturday, January 31, 2009, 7:54 AM

"You`re happier eh today."

rightttt. 
(:


Friday, January 30, 2009, 8:26 AM
//Edited at 1140AM





Another day well-spent.
Heh, despite starting the day with a bad start.
It ended on a way better note. (:

Had to run errands for the little brother and sister.
Then headed to SB simei for raspberry black tea latte.
Yay, finally! I waited so long for it!
Met natty and chatted while waiting for Mint to arrive.
Then off we went to changi broadwalk to meet up with Fadzlin and Syawal!
Jumadi was supposed to comeeeeeee, but he didn`t! zzzzt!
Sat around and ate.
The place is super peaceful and windyyy!
Then the photo session started!
Flashes after flashes which could blind us all. LOL!
Had to run around to find a toilet (which is super hard to find)
Learnt Thai words from Fadzlin.
Heee, Kin apple tea kin! :D hahahahah!
Many many photos which is going to be posted up once I get a hold of them!
But, I had an awesome time!
More to come, pretty please!

Heeeee, and Fadzlin!
You know me how long already! Still think I`m under rides until today! AHAHAH!
:P
Fadzlin not keng uh. Heh heh.

Oh, work is tomorrow and I`m lethargic. ):
I still haven`t top up my ezlink which is so troublesome.

Hahahaha, overall.
a super kickass day.
Including yesterday`s. hahahahah!

I miss you ANonymous. ):

Loads of love from the budak kecik. <3

Thursday, January 29, 2009, 7:00 AM


I was feeling ugly and Natty likes to take unglam photos of people!
Don`t believe me, ask Junjie! Hee.
Well, his unglam photos are at their retarded best. Heh heh. 

Anywayyyy,
I had an awesome time kicking balls today.
No, not literally. But I would very much like to.
Heh. 
In the end, only very little showed up.
So, me, Nad, Madi, Shafiq, Luk and Syuk ended up just passing balls.
Heee, today was my first time kicking balls. HAHAH. 
I suck at soccer cause I`m so used to playing netball. 
But, I can`t wait to join them again! Heh heh. 
Though, I know I`d suck big time. 
Had dinner over at Alfresco.
Jokes all the wayyy, and today I laughed sincerely.
I actually feel happy today.
Excluding what happened while I was waiting for Madi at downtown east bus stop.

"You are supposed to have better days, babe!"

I need hugs and support.

PS/ I want to watch underworld three pretty please? (:
PPS/ I want more days like today pretty please? (: (:




Tuesday, January 27, 2009, 8:17 AM
An almost hyperventilation in the girls` bathroom during work. 

Just great.



What`s next, Dhai? 

Monday, January 26, 2009, 8:31 AM
I wish reality would just give me some harsh wake-up call.

I am extremely tired.
Both physically and mentally.

Would everybody stop expecting so much?
I am only human.



Friday, January 23, 2009, 8:55 AM
I am fucking tired, okay.
Sick, tired, exhausted, lethargic, drained, haggard, knackered and shagged.

I`m not born to please everyone.
Why do people expect me to please everyone?
What am I? A robot?

I get crap like this at home.
I swear to God, I don`t need anymore crap like this outside.

And, sorry if I`ve been a meanie to some of you people out there.
I`ve been taking things too literal these past few days.
Heaps of sorry to those that I have been especially mean to.

Too many bad news.
I am in so many pieces right now.



Thursday, January 22, 2009, 7:53 AM






I think the pictures looks like yucks after massive editing. -.-
Okay, I should probably brush up on my photoshopping skills. 
Hahaha.

Anyway, I met up with the two lovelies. (:
First was with dee cause she needed to do some "project" which ended up being a success! 
Heeeee! :D
Then we ate at foodcourt and wound up at Pasir ris beach where we bitched and talked about everything under the sun!
And of course, major photo-session! Heh heh. 
Then Nad came along.
We ended up at Mccafe, downtown. 
Supposed to sit there for just a little bit but ended up bitching and storytelling till about 9pm?! 
Hahahah, wonderful day I must say. 
^-^v

Thank you for the chocolates! :D
Hahahahahah, I am so spoilt. LOL!
Okay, I know alrdy. Hahaha, stop telling me what a brat I am. 

Anywaaaay, 
Dee! Thank you for hearing me out woman! 
Hee, should have another day like this together with Nona and Fadzlin! :D

Okaaaaay, toodles! 
Got to run before my batt dies out! :D



Wednesday, January 21, 2009, 6:38 AM
I'm only up when you're not down
Don't wanna fly if you're still on the ground
It's like no matter what i do and
Well you drive me crazy half the time
The other half I'm only trying to
Let you know that what I feel is true
And I'm only me when I'm with you

-Taylor Swift

Heh heh heh. 
:D


I don`t want to end up at the losing end.
But who cares.
This is how i feel.
Happy happy happy. 

God, they only make you this happy when they`re planning to take something away.
Please don`t let this be the same situation.


Tuesday, January 20, 2009, 5:52 AM











All I need is just this group of people and everything would be okay.
I know it would.
And of course a few more others whose photographs aren`t available yet. 

Wish you were here, N. 
): 

PS/ Natasha, breaks my heart to tell you this but N isn`t you.
HAHAHAH! :P





Sunday, January 18, 2009, 7:01 AM
Blank spaces

Empty mind

Guarded heart


You`re supposed to be my best friend.
Maybe Nad was right, afterall.
Best friend tend to hurt you more than your ex-boyfriend did. 
I guess that`s the down side of having a male best friend.
So much for being a boybestie. 

So many disappointments.
Hopefully this isn`t a start.
Or maybe, it already is. 



Saturday, January 17, 2009, 5:38 AM
So much for being friends for four years.
You don`t even know me well enough if you thought that way.
And thank you so much for telling everybody that I backstabbed you.
So much for being a close friend. 
 
Just some crap from work.
I`m done with drama. 
As if I needed more drama in my life. 
No thanks. 

I`m going to disappear.
See you when I see you.

Take Care, N. 

Thursday, January 15, 2009, 10:18 PM
Thank you to you, you and you.

I know I made some of you worried sick. 
I am so very sorry. 

I felt a whole lot better yesterday. 
Heaps of thanks to the people who knocked some sense into me. 
You guys are very much appreciated. 
(: 

I want to disappear for a few days. 
I`ll be back stronger than ever. 
I know that is going to be so true. 

Dear N,
I miss you. 
Thank you for knocking a lot of sense into me. 
I shall see you really soon. 



Wednesday, January 14, 2009, 8:16 PM

Have you ever woke up and felt like crying your heart out? 
Well, I did. 
It is one of those rare occasions that I felt like crying out so badly.
Despite feeling sad and telling people that I want to cry, I haven`t been able to.
Maybe the reservoir for tears got dry or maybe cause I am incapable of crying at the slightest things. 
And so, I ran. 
I ran around the park till I got breathless. 
I ran till I can`t run anymore, till my feet got sore and my heart like a jackhammer. 
I ran till I felt that the problems couldn`t keep up. 
But when I got home, I cried so hard that my eyes got swollen.
Harder than I did at my Grandma`s funeral.
The expectations are all so overwhelming.
I know I am going to disappoint many. 
How can I not?
I practically screwed up my applications for nearly all the polytechnics. 
 My mom thinks I am a good-for-nothing daughter who doesn`t do chores. 
My siblings think I can`t do something without having to whine or complain. 
I`m choosy and I can`t compromise. 
And there`s more in the list than just this. 

I`m supposed to be a strong girl.
I am supposed to be able to figure things out.
But I can`t. 
Cause what I feel right now is just breaking down and cursing myself. 
I feel like cursing myself for not being able to compromise and just stick to the course in NYP.
I feel so much like a spoilt brat now. 
Maybe everybody is right.
I`m such a spoilt brat. 

I wish I could take back all the pain I have inflicted on people I care so much about.
But I can`t take back any pain I`ve inflicted on myself. 
Cause I deserved it so much. 

Please know that I love you guys, whoever that have made an impact in my life. 



Tuesday, January 13, 2009, 3:23 AM
Fright Out! Photos!
Outdated also. Hee. 














Fish & Co. Treat for Yammy before she flies off.
Hahaha, again.
Super outdated too! 







Super outdated photos of Shisha for Nad`s birthday.
Hahaha, in November. 
Super late right? LOL.







Yes, photos and more photos.
I`ll probably update the outing with Carnival crew on another day. 
I am too shagged now. 

Went to E!Hub to do my application again.
Home isn`t the best place right now. 
Zzzzt. 
I fucked up the application for TP.
Yeah, I`m screwed.
Plus, my tooth is aching like crazy. I didn`t even get to enjoy the beef prosperity meal.
Pfffft, SP application got so screwed that I cried a little.
But luckily Jon came after they ended work to help me out.
Dee was supposed to meet me but we decided not to cause she was too tired. heh. 
The postal code thing got so fucked up.
But in the end, managed to complete it and submitted it.
I just need to print it out and mail the respective documents. 

Wish me luck.
I need all the luck I can get.

(: Miss you


Monday, January 12, 2009, 4:44 AM
Life. 
One word, yet various answers as to the meaning of life itself. 

What is your life supposed to be about? 
Everybody expects something from you. 
Be it family, friends or colleagues. 
Everyone expects you to measure up to a certain degree of things. 
What if I can`t do this anymore? 
How am I supposed to deal with the fact that everyone expects me to do something? 
I have no faith in myself. 
I don`t think I can achieve my dreams. 
Maybe I should just let go of everything and just pick something.
Maybe I shouldn`t really hang on the idea to do something I`m passionate about.
Cause that doesn`t cut it in the real world.
I forgot that I`m in the real world. 
I should deal with everything. 

I feel like the biggest loser now. 



Friday, January 9, 2009, 7:50 AM

Teh sessions with the crazy duo, except Adeline cacat wants to get Milo peng instead. HAHAHA!


Thats the bloody cum they were talking about. WTH!


The prata bomb! Its actually condensed milk but they think it looks like cum. FUCK. hahaha!
And they keep asking if it tastes like condensed milk. Hahaha, idiots!



Why are our eyes so "sepet" ? 
Junjie`s new DSLR has a flash that could make the hamster with big eyes in Bedtime Stories "sepet" (!!) 


One of the crazy duo! The other one is Junjie!
Best teh buddies. heee! :D


Teh session with the crazy duo was super retarded and fun.

Since Junjie had prata bomb the last time they ate at saffron,
he had a traumatising incident with the food itself.
The prata bomb was served together with condensed milk; known as cum to the duo.
HAHAH, freaking retarded!
And our conversation went as far to bloody cum.
Gross, much? hahah. 

A snippet of our conversation;
Me: Wahh piang, so long sia the prata.
Ade: Eh, hard to produce you know the "condensed milk"
Junjie: Ya lah, you think easy ah?
Me: Fuck you, filthy minded yknow! 

We ate while we talked.
About everything and anything.
Retarded moments that we used to experience in escape and even about school.
We talked about maggots and cats and vomit.
Yes, right after we finished eating. HAHAH.
Also about CPR. HAHAHAH!
By some certain people that would make us go insane.
Yes, Junjie`s choice won hands down.
He`d either end up being crushed or impotent or go insane. 
Hahaha!
Okay, we had lotsa filthy talks. 
But it was fun being with them.
HAHAHAH! 
Definitely one of the best time I`ve had this whole week.
Distracted me for a little bit. 

More teh session okay gang? (:

*Lovessssssss


Thursday, January 8, 2009, 10:20 PM
I`m supposed to take my camera today but I`m sick. 
Geee, what a wrong day to get sick. -.-!
I need to get it asap, though. 
Anybody want to accompany me on monday? (: 

I need to clear my wardrobe and the bag area.
No more space to make way for the new ones, zzzzt. 
I need a new pair of shoes. 
Okay maybe not one. many new pairs. Heh, :D

Okay, I gotta run.
Hopefully I get to go Ikea with Fadzlin and Nona.
Teh tarik with Ade & Junjie! 

:D

*lovesssssss


, 6:52 AM

chapter 2.11 ; never ever come to my man. told ya. says:
Budak kecik must have many happy and better days okay!!

Aww, Nona Malinda totally made my day yesterday.
Heh, I miss her heaps. 
But I get to meet her and Fadzlin tomorrow!
Yay! *Throws confetti* 

Alrightey, Today was pretty much okay.
Followed mum to SGH and gave her some of the pay that I received today.
Initial plan was to head over to SP to meet Mel.
But we were goddamn lazy. 
Today is just one effing weird day. 
"Stalkers" and definitely deranged man. Tsk. 
Met up with Sri at Kimage then we proceeded to City hall.
Walked aimlessly till we found an ice cream shop(!!!)
We decided to try since we were damn famished. Hahah! 
Finally mel came down and we went over to SourPuss cafe for early dinner. 
The ambience is definitely nice and so are the staffs.
The food was awesome!
The calamari had a "muruku" flavour which was weird but nice. 
Mel and Sri had grilled chic salad while I had the aussie burger.
It was super filling and worth our 60 bucks. hee. 
Then we walked to Sg Flyer and sat by the bay to have our usual girls` talk.
I miss them a whole lot. Its been ages since we did those things.
Shopped at Marina Sq as usual and cabbed home! LOL!
Pictures will be up together with Fright Out! staff party!

Loves! (:


Wednesday, January 7, 2009, 12:27 AM


Hey yall. (: 
Since my last post was pretty depressing, lets lighten things up a little. 
I shall blog about the staff party 2009. 

It was pretty boring as compared to 2007`s. 
Although 2007`s didn`t have any games, but there was a gift exchange & best dressed competition. hee. 
The theme was pretty hard and weird. 
But I guess what I miss the most were the old crew, both revenue & rides. 
But its okay, I managed to have some fun.
And I was pulled on stage by Nana.
Yes, it was embarrassing `cause, as usual, I was freaking blur.
Hahaha, but I got a cute bag that reminded me of NDP. lol.
Also, managed to snap a couple of photos with some of the people there. 
I didn`t manage to snap with all of the jumpsuits cause mainly there was a freaking clown involved. 
Walked to inter and the whole entire time, me and Juliana were trying to make Fazuan and Hakim kiss each other. 
We managed to succeed! but they stopped themselves in time.
Hahahah, it was pretty hilarious. 
So, that was pretty much it. 
Nothing interesting happened. Haha.  

Anyway, I can`t wait for tomorrow`s date with my girls; Mel & Sri! heee.
Its been some time since we hanged out with each other. 
Yayy, can`t wait! :D


Tuesday, January 6, 2009, 6:41 AM
I stayed at home the whole day.
I did the laundry and swept the floor.
After which, I glued my eyes to the macbook to catch Freedom Writers online.
It is truly inspiring. 
I shed a tear or two towards the middle part when they had a "Toast for change" and some kid read his diary entry. 
They managed to overcome their differences and be united. 
Believe me, it is definitely hard for them to even be in the same class since they all have issues with one another which includes violence towards one another. 
In the end, they changed themselves for the better. 
Even up to having to go against their own race. 
 
"You are the heroes. You are heroes every day. But even an ordinary secretary or a housewife or a teenager can, within their own small ways, turn on a small light in a dark room." 

Then I watched Coach Carter online.
Another inspiring movie about teenagers changing their course of life. 
About how passionate they are about basketball and how united they are as a team that they helped out each other. 
Especially when Timo had to do many suicides by the end of the day and the team helped him out.
Yes, the movies are inspirational and heart-warming.

"There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."


I don`t know what I feel. 
Its happened all of a sudden. 
I feel like I`m always worrying people. 
Be it family members or friends.
They are always worried about me.
Yes, I do know that they are concerned and they love me.
But sometimes I wish I could just grow up and learn to shut up.
I should know that everybody else have their own problems and I should learn to solve mine by myself.
I should grow up and be independent.
Isn`t that part of my resolution? 
Its not that I don`t trust anyone. 
Its just that I am insecure for a little bit. 
What if I depend too much on someone? 
What if they disappoint me? 
I can`t help but feel a little guarded. 
I don`t wish to end up making the same mistake thrice. 
I know its as if I`m judging them and thinking the worst of them, I don`t.
Its just that I can`t help myself but think about it. 
I do appreciate them, I really do. 
I really need to grow up.
I am too spoilt and pampered for my own good. 
I should learn that there are no such things as happy endings. 
I should learn to think using my head and not always follow my heart. 
I should learn to be more rational and considerate. 

Sigh.
So much for better days.


Monday, January 5, 2009, 9:59 PM

31ST DECEMBER 2008; Yammy`s departure at T3





27TH DECEMBER 2008; Jon`s xmas party
















24TH DECEMBER 2008; Lepak session at Alfresco

















To be continued with more on Yammy`s departure & Staff Party 2009. 
(:



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