Hello, everyone(:

& No, the picture above isn`t from the fireworks at Marina today.

Just some random picture in one of my files.

Goodbye, 2008!

It has been happy, fun, crappy, sad, interesting, eventful, disappointing, teary, wonderful and challenging. 

Everything rolled into one. 

It has taught me a whole lot of things. 

I am glad that I could have a brand new start for 2009. 

I can`t wait. 

So, countdown today was held at the Airport as we sent Yam off. 

Mint was supposed to fetch me but he had something on so we changed plans.

Went to Airport by bus with Azura, Farah, Is, Hidayah, Roziana and Shikin.

Reached and saw the rest.

Snapped crazy pictures and it was so chaotic.

But it was nice to see everyone.

It was still sad to watch Yam go through the gates. Nevermind, we can skype. 

hee. 

Counted down to 12 at the airport itself. Hahahaah! It was nice feeling and noisy.

Took the bus home alone. LOL.

Okay, wasn`t that eventful.

Was too tired to care.

Lunch with the family at town later in the afternoon, can`t hardly wait! hee. (: 

See ya`ll.

Have a kickass 2009, okay?

Lotsa love, everyone`s budak kecik. Heeeee. :D

That`s Yaminah, otherwise known as, Yammy. 

Sorry for the old picture. I have not gotten any recent picture of me and her from the others. 

She is leaving later tonight.

I`ll miss her heaps. 

She is one of the best people I`ve met in 2008.

The one who never fail to knock some sense into my head. 

She is an awesome advisor, friend, listener and "sister".

Yes, she is all of the above.

She is usually the one who encourages and takes care of me. 

She is the one who usually tells me not to care of what others think

She is usually the one who tells me to not disappoint my parents anymore and go to school.

I`ll miss texting her randomly.

I`ll miss our impromptu meetings.

I`ll miss her over-confident actions. (HAHAH!)

I`ll miss her randomness online.

I`ll miss her impromptu hikes. 

I`ll miss her spy-like picture-snapping.

I`ll miss her wanna-act-fierce-face. 

Okay, to cut short, I`ll miss everything about her.

She is the kind of friend I would miss, 

not because she always listens to my whines and rants.

But because she`d always know what to say to make me feel a whole lot better.

Even when she`d sidetrack the whole conversation. 

It`d always cheer me up. 

I am grateful for knowing someone like you, even if it was only for a year plus.

You`ve been an awesome friend, advisor, listener and sister to me. 

I wish you all the best for future endeavours. 

Have a safe flight and life there.

Heh, please do come back with a nice accent and a hot boyfriend. 

Yknow, we can always skype. heh.

Love you friend! <3

Its already the new year`s eve. 

Tomorrow would already be a start of a brand new year.

Which would mean a brand new start. 

I can`t wait for 2009. 

To start school and start my course of life.

Finally a new purpose in life. 

Don`t worry, I won`t disappoint anyone this time round.

I already know what am I aiming for. 

2008 has been intense. 

It started all sugary sweet in the beginning and it turned bitter in the middle.

But I am glad that things are going to end sweet all over again. 

For some of you who know,

I broke my resolution for this year.

That is probably why I am not going to waste my time to think of a new one. 

But funny thing is that I never regretted breaking that resolution at all. (: 

2008 has been one hard year.

But through it all, I managed to overcome every obstacle. 

Thank to God. 

I am now a stronger being.

I have made some minor improvements, attitude-wise. (: 

2008 has also been wonderful.

Thanks to the most kick-ass companions, ever. 

They never fail to knock some sense into me when the need arises. 

They never fail to support me, either. 

Yes, they have been my pillar of strength for the entire year and I love everyone of them very much.

Even you, Aliman, though you have been a pain in my ass for the entire year, you are one of the awesome people okay. heh. 

Cheers, 2008!

And Hello, 2009! 

I am hoping for a happier me. 

(:

I`m wishing damn hard. 

Please, please give me this just one big break. 

I`m gonna do what it takes to show that I can do it.

And that I never really needed you.

Although I showed you my most vulnerable side the other day, you`ll see. 

Cause I shouldn`t.

As much as I want to. 

I have to for the better of everything else. 

As much as I appreciate everything you`ve done for me. 

Its for the best.

2009 is approaching and I should end this right here right now.

And start a new chapter. 

I have to.

Cause I still think you`re some stranger. 

Cause we can`t reverse the chemistry. 

Cause no matter how hard I wish, things aren`t gonna go the way its supposed to be. 

Right here, right now.

This is where it`ll all end. 

No strings attached. Nothing. 

We`ll go back to square one okay? 

I`m done. 

I`ve let everything out.

I feel better. Way better. 

I`m better than this.

I`m not wondergirl, but I`m better than this. 

(:

I`m down with a case of fever and tummy ache.

And no, the tummy ache wasn`t from the party.

It was much before. haha.

Work was alright. heh.

Went to Jon`s party with Nad and the rest.

Sprayed our hairs purple and silver under his blk which took us around 30minutes? hahaha!

Chaotic, as usual.

The food was nice.

Lotsa lotsa chocolates! :D

Heh, Jon gave me two kinder beunos cause he owed me. LOL!

Ohyeaaaaah, I envy his collection of Paulo Coelho`s novels. heh.

We played 'Om Chucky' thingy again.

Sri and Naz had to do a forfeit which is eat chocolate and marshmellow coated chilli sauce! HAHAHA, IT WAS DAMN HILARIOUS OKAY!

and Tazzie is goddamn bigggg!

But super cute and shyy! heh, still big! 

Anyway, it was fun. (: 

Thanks Nad for sending me home and stuffs. Thanks alot babe! (:

& I can`t wait for 30th! heeeeeeeee. 

PICTURES WILL BE UP SOON! PROMISE!

Everything got so messed up.

I`m one defiant kid, I know. 

But it was out of anger and I couldn`t stand it anymore. 

I know my mistakes now and I shall work on it okay? 

Special thanks to Dee, Nadiah, Yaminah & Jon for being super sweet and nice. 

I know you all love me and care for me. (:

Heaps of thanks to Sri for everything.

You have been simply awesome and I love you to death, girl. 

Also heaps and heaps of thanks to Aliman. 

For coming all the way down from Mustaffa and staying with me till 3am. 

For listening and advising me. I really appreciate your concern and advices though I acted way difficult. 

Thank you all. 

I`m trying my best now. 

Don`t worry. (:

A whole entire afternoon, evening & night spent;

With none other than the dearest bacins. heh. 

It was simply awesome. 

I had the most wonderful lepak session with them since they quitted. 

It was funny, especially with the tits game. 

HAHAHAH, fucking hilarious.

Non-stop camwhoring. 

Watching Housebunny at Yam`s place earlier made us even more nuts than usual. 

Sorry Madi for having to entertain our tits game at Yam`s place and in the car. HAHAHAHAH! 

It was awesome though.

I miss them so muchhhhh. (: 

Okayy, some people were missing like Fazuan, Aliman and some others. heh. 

Pictures will be uploaded once I have them with me. hee.

Hello monsoon season

Hello lazy feeling

Hello hot chocolate

Hello puddles and puddles

-----------

Goodbye hot weather

Goodbye smoothies and icecream

Goodbye flipflops and berms

Goodbye outdoors

Oh, what a wonderful feeling.

Merry christmas, everyone. (: 

Spread the love, can`t wait for later. 

I watched Make it happen today.

& Suddenly, I felt a tinge of helplessness all over again.

Yes, I know I`m supposed to be getting over it.

But it isn`t as easy as it looks. 

I felt the urge to dance again like some mad woman, 

because that is how I let myself loose. 

That is how I relieve myself of all the stress. 

Its hard, effing hard. 

I am so down right now. 

My mood fluctuates alot nowadays. 

I miss you, do you know that? 

To my dearest baby girl,

You have always been the strongest one among all of us. 

Like seriously, you`re like superwoman sometimes. 

You are strong and you definitely will be able to get through this.

I know its weird and probably, stressing you out very much.

But everything happens for reason okay. 

I am always here for you. 

No doubt about it, heh. 

We`ll get through with this. 

Just don`t go youtube about all these again, cause it`ll give you the jitters okay!

And remember, just let out every pent-up emotions. (:

I love you, woman! heh. 

I can`t wait for the new year. 

A brand new start for everything.

2008 has been an awesome year, filled with many happy things.

And also, sad ones. 

But hey, life can`t be perfect right? (: 

& Also, ____________ for the first week of the new year. Hee. 

Dear God, Please make it happen. 

I have never wanted anything so badly before.

I can`t wait for 2009! :D

Which is just next weeeek.

I`ll just have to distract myself from the fact that I can`t dance anymore. 

Its sad and depressing, I know. 

I don`t need blind empathy. 

No, I`m more than that. 

Its just sad to know I can`t do it anymore. 

On a lighter note, alot of dates to busy myself with!

22nd: Starbucks 

23rd: Karaoke session with Nad, Naz and dunno-who-else

24th: Last lepak session with Yam at Alfresco! Yay, can`t wait to meet all of them! :D

27th: Jon`s Xmas Open House (?)

31st: Countdown at Airport! 

And more to come.

I can`t wait.

Today was a blast.

I had fun with all of them;

Yam, Nad, Nona, Maya and Dee.

It was fun and I love all of them. Heh. 

Shall post the photos up soon! (:

I feel

I know people around me care.

I know there are people who love me and want me to be healthy.

Its not that I don`t appreciate.

Its just that its too sad to give it up entirely. 

I know I can always choose a different hobby, but this is different.

I feel seriously confused and sad.

I wish I could talk to you.

I miss you, stranger. 

You don`t even say hello anymore. 

Can`t wait for sunday, (:

Trying and trying.

That`s all I`m doing. 

I am trying to be happy.

I am trying to be patient.

I am trying to get over it. 

I am one sensitive girl these past few days. 

Crying at the slightest things.

I need to be strong.

I shouldn`t be vulnerable.

I need to.

A lazy Sunday morning.

With the rain crashing against the window panes, 

starting the day with a gloomy feeling.

No, I am not okay.

My mood swing is fluctuating.

One minute, I feel okay.

And the next, someone would piss me off.

Why oh why?

What did I do?

First it was my bestfriend, 

now my family.

Is everyone out to disappoint me?

If yes, then come on.

I won`t react today.

I am too tired to do so. 

You ditched me.

Yeah, you did.

You don`t even share a single shit with me.

You`re not my bestfriend.

I don`t even know who you are now. 

Since you`re already M.I.A, just go away for good.

Whatever. 

You can do whatever you like and I won`t care anymore.

`Cause I`m sick of being the one who has to fuss over you. 

I`m sick of being the one on the other end, when you don`t even bother at all. 

I`m sick of being the one trying and trying. 

On a lighter note, 

I can`t wait for work. 

(: 

It hurt.

I am disappointed. 

Very very much.

But you can take your time.

Though, I`ll doubt you`d ever tell me anyway.

So either way, I`ll be wasting my time trying to fuss over you. 

I just hope that you`re alright.

Don`t bottle things up cause its not good for the health. 

Just let it out to anyone, okay? 

Lastly, I miss you. 

I miss spending time with you. 

Well, take care okay boy? 

Why are you here? 

Right now. 

When I don`t need you at all.

Why are you still around?

Right there. 

When I`m enjoying my life and living every bit of it.  

Why must you suddenly make your appearance again? 

Right here. 

When I`m trying my best to forget you. 

Why do you treat me like someone who`d always be around when you`re having trouble in the paradise? 

You told me to never go around looking for it.

I didn`t. 

Let me try again, please.

Cooling weather 

Wonderful getaway, seriously.

I had a wonderful time with my cousins. 

Non-stop feasting = FAT!

Still, it was pretty nice cause all of us couldn`t stop eating.

I am on certified happy kid cause I got to eat my favourite chendol! 

Heeeeee! :D

I miss work, too. LOL.

OMG!
I did the unthinkable!
Thanks to Nona Malinda! heeeeeeeeeee.

:D

Going going, I`m gone away (:
Bye ya`ll.

Sometimes, I wonder if we could reverse the chemistry. 

Cause sometimes I wonder what its like to be with you again.

Like old times.

Then I realised, we`re not cut out for this. 

Or rather, I am not cut out for this.

I hope you`re happy. 

Cause I miss talking to you and sharing things with you. 

I hope we`ll get to talk pretty soon. 

On a lighter note, I`m heading to KL tomorrow. 

Away from everything and everyone. 

I can`t wait for retail therapy. 

Take care of yourself, okay? (:

"Let`s get these teen hearts beating faster, faster.

Will you dance to this beat and hold a lover close?" 

<3

"Eh Dhai, why today you`re like so happy?"

HAHAHAH!
I swear I felt stress-free just now!
No kidding, okay! :D

Anyway, I got to meet up with Cacat-boy!
Heeee, also known as LIM JUNJIE!
Plus, Natty and Weiyan!
We snapped stupid photos and talked randomly.
It was nice meeting them!

Yaaaaaay, KL trip is in a few days!
I got to cut my hair!
Its already thick, OMG!
Probably gonna cut my fringe, snap snap. Hee.

Okay, I`m feeling weird now.
Byeeeeeeee lovelies! <3

I`m like on freaking cloud 9.

I don`t think I`ve been this happy before. Heh. 

It sure feels good. 

(: 

I`m weak and vulnerable. 

I just realised that I`m no superhuman. 

I felt like doing it again. 

I`m sorry, people. 

I know I`ve already disappointed some of you. 

All I can say is I`m sorry. 

I`m happy.

Cause I get to have a nice chat with Dee and Yammy.

Not forgetting Fadzlin who left early due to being sick. 

Heh. 

Dee/Yammy`s PA, you are the ultimate best.

I just miss Nona Malinda now. HAHAHA! 

(:

Raspberry Frappucino & Dorothy Koomson`s Novel is therapeutic.

Hee, I`m one happy girl already.

I can`t wait for KL trip this coming Sunday. 

Retail Therapy, yo! 

Plus, I get to meet my dearest cousin!

Hakim! You better get your ass to KL okay? 

We have loads to explore! Heh! 

:D

Yay, Things are getting better and better. 

I am fine.

Happy.

Rejuvenated.

Ecstatic.

Overjoyed.

Elated.

On cloud 9.

Its just that I didn`t feel like meeting many many people who could see through me today. 

Cause I know, 

when they keep prying, I`d have a public breakdown. 

I miss them, though.