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Profile Entries Affiliates
Only almost here

Sunday, April 27, 2008, 10:44 PM

Dear Anonymous:


I wish everyday was as easy as snapping this laughing picture.
God, I swear fate is never kind.
It gets even worst each day.
I guess though I know this is that "this is life" moment. 
Well, it doesn`t cross out the fact that it has been unkind, to me, particularly.
I wonder how people can always go their normal life, free and easy.
Sometimes I wish life was like that;

I don`t get this feeling.
I miss you a whole lot.
Probably because when I talk to you, its like talking to a twin.
I don`t get this feeling, ever.
I don`t understand us. 
Maybe, that goes to show I don`t understand myself.
Hows that for a self-reflection?
Sigh, this feeling gets worst each day.
Tell me you don`t want to talk to me anymore and I`ll do the same.
"Yeah, i guess" doesn`t make things any better.
In fact, I feel like I`m someone you just have to get along.
Like there`s no choice at all.
You initiated it so why do I feel like fuck?
Fuck, guys are like the most intricate creatures ever.
No wait, humans are the most complicated beings.
Hmmmm. no matter.
I shall wait.
A week more to go and I`ll be out of your life. (:

I don`t know its a good or a bad thing;

, 9:07 AM



Dear Anonymous:


Work was messy.
Shall not elaborate.
I`m sorry to those who i threw my tantrums around.
No offence yeah? (:


I can`t be near you.
Cos I`ll remember every single thing.
You used to be my source of comfort since the day I got to know you.
You used to be the first person to know everything.
(sometimes the last one too)
You used to be there, despite not really being there.
Like what he said, we were like glue.
Damn, I miss you.
I know the phrase, "there`s other fishys in the sea."
But you can`t help but always wishing you could just stick to that simple, plain fish.
And I`m effing tired of playing games.
I just wished things would be direct. sigh.
If onlyyyyyy~


I miss you,heaps. ):
One week and Farewell.

Thursday, April 17, 2008, 5:29 AM



Dear Anonymous;

Poly life has started. 
Life is okay now, stressed too. 
Alot of projects needed to be done in a short span of time. 
Gaaaaah, lack of sleep.
Classes ending at 6pm everyday except on monday cos no school.
LOL~   ^-^
Polymates are awesomeeeee.
ever-so supportive and easy to get along with! :D

Today, I had drawing fundamentals, colour theory and media theory.
Damn sleeeeeepy okay. sheeesh.
Managed to do the sketches and collages by deadlines.
Now, have to think abt the project for presentation next wednesday! 
GAAAAH~
any ideas people? (:

Until next time, loves*

Monday, April 14, 2008, 9:33 AM
Dear Anonymous;


Today, Sri and me were having a chat about ETP carnival.
We decided not to quit for now.
As what others taught us would be wasted.
I`ve decided that I want to do what Faizah and Farhan did for me;
which is to teach and guide the new ones along.
Like what Faizah said, "I didn`t teach you all this for you to quit with me"
Besides, After what Abg Im and Naz had to say.
Life goes on;
Like what Abg Im told me and Junjie, we can`t always expect to work with the same person cos once we stepped into the real working world, we`re expected to work with a wide variety of people.
And that made me think.


Eventhough I`ve only been working for 5months,
I used to be under the supervision of Elaine & Kak Su.
I know that eventhough it hurts & I can`t come into terms with them leaving,
I should be giving her a chance to cope and adapt.
Eventhough, it sucks real bad and its going to be very different.
Thats what Abg Im told me.
And I believe I should be sharing all this with those new carnival crew who feel like quitting.


(:
Thats all.
I know how you guys feel.
I feel way worst.

Sunday, April 13, 2008, 10:31 AM



My External family. The only reason why I go to work every time.
The only reason why I`d rather sacrifice my weekends working than to have no plans.
The reason for all the smiles and laughters.
The reason why I love working at Escape ThemePark so much.
Just now, I became the 2nd I/c for the afternoon shift.


I busied myself by going to c3 alot of times.
I did everything Kak Su said cos that is going to be the last time.
I tried controlling myself by distancing myself away from her, but that didn`t work.
I ended up crying uncontrollably when I saw the gift Vincent gave to Kak Su on her table.
Then, every memory came flooding back.
I miss those moments whereby we`d always be the last department to leave cos we`d always be waiting for either Kak Su or Elaine.
I miss those stupid sessions in the OPS room.
I cried and cried. Junjie just watched.
We were about to leave until Imran, the rides manager, saw.
He invited us to chat and he advised us.
He said that we should just be professional and continue working.
And if we didn`t like the environment at work, we could always slack with the rides crew.
Especially since, I`m close to them.
But that would be different.
Saying that we shouldn`t be crying cos it`d make Kak Su feel bad.
I have to admit that what he said made me come into terms with reality but sad too.
No one could ever replace Kak su. no one.

During closing.
Me and Junjie wanted everything to be a fast game.
We even did the inventory quickly so as to not miss the last briefing with Kak Su.
And it cheered me up to see everyone there.
Those who left too.
The only person missing was Faizah.
Kak su said this, "Elaine is my top prize and you all are my prizes"
That teared me up like crazy.
Despite knowing her for only half a year, she has helped me alot.
Be it about some guy or even family matters.
When she hugged me, Tears just fell.
Seeing Elaine at Vertical made me realise how much I miss those old times.
Whereby, she`s give funny briefings.
I miss those times with the seniors. sigh.
i just miss it alot.

Slacking at Alfresco was fun.
The most fun time at work of all.
Everybody was like snapping pictures, talking and catching up.
It cheered me up to see everyone looking happy.
It made me miss those old times alot too.
But I`m lucky cos I won`t be working until some time.
Maybe I`ll see new faces.
But at least I won`t feel the sadness until I start work.
sigh.
Presenting the best supervisors; Elaine Xu & Suhaidah.

I miss those moments terrbly.
No more. sigh, ):

Friday, April 11, 2008, 8:31 AM


Dear Anonymous;

Its been some time since I managed to post pictures.
Yes, I`ve gotten myself a MacBook in white.
Orientation was okay. No, actually, it was horrible boring.
Made new friends and they`re why I`m looking forward to school.
Yeaaaay, no school for monday.
Hence, we`ll be meeting to get to know each other better.
Heee, cool! :D

Went to Mccafe just now.
With mel and shammie came later on.
Learnt how to photoshop using Mac, Thanks to Nona.
Jet over to her chalet.
Slacked for a little bit.
Met daddy for dinner and headed home.

ZZZT.
I`m sorry.
what more do you want? ):
I miss you alot. sigh.

Thursday, April 10, 2008, 8:25 AM
Dear Anonymous;


I cried too much these days.
Going to the toilet and cry away.
In the midst of using the computer,
in my room when i`m alone.
When no one is looking,
when I`m staring out of the window.


sigh.
there are others who are experiencing even worst fate.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008, 5:58 AM
Dear Anonymous;

I seriously hate whats going on right now.
Whats going through my mind, its very suckish.
I get pretty pissed easily these days. is that bad?
I don`t see the need to cry, but I want to let things out.
But I`m afraid i`ll lash it out to someone who is innocent.
I don`t understand, this stupid stupid feeling.
How can something so minor get so complicated?
Whenever I think that we`re okay, things go wrong.
I mean, even you.
One minute you say one thing and the next minute, you say another.
What`s that supposed to mean?
You`re being fickle-minded and that affects me.
I don`t know whats wrong with me.
I don`t know why the sudden change.
Things are home is like a madhouse.
I can`t have two things going wrong, not right now.
And, he is suddenly appearing again.
Oh god, I can`t help but feel lost.
I can`t believe I forgot that my grandma has already passed away.
That made things even worst.


sigh.

Wednesday, April 2, 2008, 7:51 PM
Dear Anonymous;


Just when you thought you got the whole world figured out,
it backfires on you.
I can`t help but feel weak, each & everytime.
That I`m so vulnerable to everything around me,
that includes the people too.
I know that running till I puke is stupid,
but I can`t control it.
No, I`m not trying to be aneroxic or bullimic.
But sometimes, running on an empty stomach does that.
I`m not trying to hurt myself, no.
I know better than to do that,
I`ve been through counselling remember?
I know what`s right and what`s wrong.
I`m trying my best to change, but its easier said than done.
I`m trying my utmost best to change, to be more sensible.
Its not easy, yknow.
Especially with my kind of surrounding at home.
I`m trying to enlighten people abt whats going on,
but its hard.
Cos what I want right now isn`t sympathy.
I just want that someone who can release me of my problems,
even if its only for awhile.
I want someone who can make me forget about my past,
what I used to do and stuffs.
God, this is killing me.
I got to be away from all this.


Till next time,
whenever that would be. ♥

, 1:55 PM
Dear Anonymous;


Life is getting mundane as time goes by.
HAHAH, well not really. ^-^
The thing that I`d look forward to every weekend is work.
Its simply enjoyable to see everyone.
"Fun people serving Fun people" well, the first two words is true, that is.
I remember all the stupid jokes that they made.
LOL. I`d miss....
Yasin's; "Bagi, Bagi sama dia. kasih kasih"
Hahahaha, its an inside joke you see.
Junjie`s; "Slap your face! / you got issues okay!"
HAHAH, & of course my trademark answer would be, "Face not free kay"
Adzri's; Super random jokes & his signature "girlygirl" face.
Lol, really! He looks like a girl from far!
Farhan`s; okaaaaay. haha, his stupid and cheesy jokes.
HAHAH, okay Imma miss that part where you`d scare me to death at Flume shop! ASS.


Okay, thts all that I can remember for now.
Everyone has a distinct quality that makes them lovable.
HAHAH, I`m so gonna miss them.
(PS. I KNOW JUNJIE IS NOT LEAVING, yet. BT HIS TRADEMARK PHRASE CRACKS ME UP! :D)
All the best for future endeavours okay guys? (:
Next outing will be on the saturday after payday, okay? AHAH.
Shopping babbbby~ ^-^


Lovethemheaps! :D


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